why we write

"You write to communicate to the hearts and minds of others what's burning inside you. And we edit to let the fire show through the smoke."

- Arthur Plotnik, editor and author (b. 1937)

"bring back your wisdom to trade, bring back the words you've saved and teach me, so that i may teach on."

fight songs

". . . only music may span that space between the finite and the infinite . . . music may be the means of arousing and awakening the best of hope, the best of desire, the best in the heart and soul of those who will and do listen. Is not music the universal language, both for those who would give praise and those who are sorry in their hearts and souls? Is it not a means, a manner of universal expression! Thus may the greater hope come."

Edgar Cayce Reading 2156-1

do you remember what the music meant?

i've had this dream before, i know just how it ends

ampere, "wormwood, radiation"

i've had this dream before, i know just how it ends. our eyes will fill with flame. our hearts will swell & explode. woodlawn is a place of abandoned hopes & dreams, of always wilting flowers & letters never read. but there is life here. you can hear it in the soil. you can see it in the shadows, etched in stone: "there is life here." so we're three years removed, and the earth around us has set. though the gears have stopped turning, the engine still hums. rewind, repeat, i see you there. you're alive on every page of every book. i hear your voice in echoes, in every line. this doesn't get any easier. this is a wound that time can't heal. it leaves a scar.

you cannot sway what's on the inside

edgar cayce reading 815-2: "First know in self in what thou hast believed, and then set that as the ideal . . . And when the darker days come, and when the shadows come that would make thee afraid, turn within and have a good time at scaring the bogies away from those that would fear, that would doubt."

Through troubled times, news of hatred, death and war,

Find signs of an end, but it may just seem to be okay,

And I'm not alone, when I say I feel enough to think,

I know there's dark in all things so I find the light and struggle on

Lead me with a grip so tight, I'll move ahead, I'll break the path,

I'll cross the line, and still reach out,

Wash my mind or stab my back but spirit stays my friend,

You can not sway what's on the inside

Messin' around, but if it feels like serious, I fall to the ground,

And I pick myself up, so I can face th days,

Learn on my own but I get so much from things I see these days,

Vivid, so clear, I can't see why it's hard to understand

countdown to christmas morning

madeleine, "christmas morning," from the "there is a light" comp.

your friends, they aren't anything like my friends

"... your friends, they aren't anything like my friends. (don't think I ever felt that way, swear to god, I felt depression's full weight that day, but with my friends I'll be ok.)"

Edgar Cayce Reading 2514-3: "Any exercise also among others, with groups, is well for the body. As there is the desire for more companionship, use it - the companionship - for creative influences; a living thankfulness to the Creative Forces for the

OPPORTUNITIES for a service in this world. For, as ye do unto others, ye do unto thy Maker."

show light

"As we stand united


There's forces to fight us


More taking than giving, an idea for living, but not the right one


Why fall without a fight


Hold your ground and stand


I'll sing until I die, so I'll live again


I don't want to stand divided


Hold my breath for decision


I will breathe


Until I'm lifted


Fail to recognize is nothing, letting it slide, that is something.


Block them from your makings and show light."

Edgar Cayce Reading 3991-1: "The body, with its physical condition, would do well to remember that the giving out of the mental attitude toward others, is the same as will be received to itself, and that as these thoughts or vibrations or expressions give out to others, we receive these in return; that if we would bring the best to self and others, we should give of our best to others, see."

portraits of past reunion at death by audio

one of the best shows i've ever seen...

home for the holidays

"we've seen some real hard times, and i hope the hardest are behind, but there will be times when it will seem like we are caught someplace in between the ocean and the storm without a shore.

we'll find our own way home and sing out every song we know, no one can keep us down.

and who gives a fuck what anybody says, we'll live and love until we're dead, holding on to what we've come to know.

and on and on and on and on, and every time you hear this song be sure you are not alone."

angel witch

so good.

it's the end of a year

replacements

not sure what to make of this except that it is awesomely weird.

shook ones at the fest 7

open with a descendents cover nice!

Shook Ones at The Fest 7 (Warehouse Show)
by NationalUnderground

proud hatebreed fan

boston straight edge

school colors

rocking this to the syracuse game.

if you love me you will buy this for me.

ebay.

veteran's day

hot water music, "position"

prepare yourself for the moments of the breakdowns of the questions this is what keeps us going down so don't let it push us inside this is what i despise is that treason since my days i've learned some certain ways to keep away from certain ways it's what i've learned it's what i've made sometimes i am put down but i'm sure to stand up like a champion like a soldier with strong will sure i think like anyone about what is about to come but what is the point in dwelling when we all could be sharing this is what i've learned and made and i won't back down from my right of standing or from my choice of position

guerilla urban farming

window farms in the latest cool hunting video...

"...death believes in me."

After Rousseau

The mountains are nude

But not cold.

I shiver.


I believe in death


Now that death believes in me.

DONALD REVELL

The Bitter Withy

Alice James Books

brooklyn gangs

awesome archival footage of old school bushwick gang, the devil's rebels from curbed.

guerilla urban design

pop up lunch makes taking back the streets super easy and delicious...

red hook

feelbettervin sent me this from urban sketchers.

kind of captures what i love about my new neighborhood. still kind of maritime, still a little deserted, but still weirdly urban.

your new favorite band

timely cohabitation advice

"First big job is to conquer self! Know the ideal. Do apply it in self. Learn to live with self and you'll learn to live with others. People are not different from yourself. They have ideas also and they may be just as near right as self. But there is an ideal way. How? Living with others."

- Edgar Cayce

orange song

native, "flaschdance"

orange song

this orange song

makes me

smell leaves

burning, cool

massachusetts

fall night. hearth

of the heart of

this autumn town.

main street leaves,

streetlight pale, peel

off towards the lake

heading home.

good to know for when i get my doggy

around the corner on van brunt in red hook.

samhain

cobble hill representing for halloween.

oldies guy

have seen this dude in my old neighborhood for years.

always cruising around, blaring oldies, totally stoked.

big ups!

A Place To Be In Harmony from russel fong on Vimeo.

the dark tailor

The Dark Tailor

The dark tailor goes through a lot

in Boston. My dad's birth cost him

his wife, who bleeds to death one hot

August night. He is a widower

and keeps on sewing suits and skirts,

this immigrant born in the blur

of the Pale. I still invent his face,

his fury and his height, his nose

and speech. If only I could race

up the tenement steps to his door,

knock and say, ''I'm Billy, I'm ten,

you are my unseen ancestor,

I want to have some fun with you

before you die." He is amazed,

gives me a cunning look, and spews

some stupid crap about my dad,

yet feeds me. I pick up his iron,

fire the stove, and he gets mad

and tries to thrash me, but I skate

out of his reach, bouncing around,

duck in the closet, smash some plates.

He breaks up laughing. Finally

we talk like grown-ups and forget

our lives. Maybe he thinks of me

some evening. I often invent

the dark tailor stitching this suit

I'm wearing now, and we lament.

WILLIS BARNSTONE

New Letters

Volume 75, No. 4

advice

help

In the hope, in the associations, in the directing; not by long precepts, but by the living example; ye may bring harmony to many. For thy presence oft brings peace to others, when they will not even admit it. But it must be within self first, before ye may give it to others.

Edgar Cayce Reading 2376-4

i remember this

i remember this

the last guy

to tattoo me

died. i

didn't know him

well. he was

a friend of

a friend. not

anonymous,

but almost.

whenever the beak

of the bird breaks

beyond my sleeve,

i remember this.

agnostic front lip sync

super weird cable access show. agnostic front "plays along" to their victim in pain cassette.

number 1 with a bullet

ridiculous 1 million fps slow motion bullet strikes.

back to work

"You'll try to expand your professional activity and at the same time manage your finances carefully; your efforts will be quickly rewarded. Your sense of business and transactions will seem somewhat blunted; don't force your talent, wait some time for recovering all your efficiency. Know that reading is for your mind an indispensable food. Don't read good books: there're really too many of them; only read the best ones. You won't spare your pains in order to improve your purchasing power."

october in the railroad earth

seems to be shaping up to be a pivotal month.

shrugging it off, breathing out, getting back to the work of life.

A good day for forming amorous projects, to get married, to go on a honeymoon trip. A propitious moment for a moving or to begin the construction of an individual house. You'll be going to get through a lean period. A favorable day to take initiatives and to seek supports which would help in your professional success; go ahead and you'll succeed, especially if you make use of all your power of persuasion. You'll be like a bear with a sore head! Try to control your comportment.

09.09.09

happy nine nine nine.

and happy birthday to mike frank!

taking the city

joshua 8:8: "And it will be, when you have taken the city, that you shall set the city on fire."

"For the greater individual is the one who is the servant of all. And to conquer self is greater than taking many cities. For, here ye may find humbleness as against that which cries oft for expression, and the feeling of not being appreciated. Express it more in the greater amount of love upon those who may be aided through thy effort. For, remember, man looks upon the things of the day but God looks upon the heart."

Edgar Cayce Reading 3253-2

first day back

first day back, back to work.

it's time to live today, incarnation

happy birthday to me.

converge: 09.03.09

10:13: 10:13 pm. burgeoning full moon.

giving up the ghost: 15th day of the 7th lunar month, the ghost festival: "On the fifteenth day the realms of Heaven and Hell and the realm of the living are open and both Taoists and Buddhists would perform rituals to transmute and absolve the sufferings of the deceased."

my war: "1783 – American Revolutionary War: The war ends with the signing of the Treaty of Paris by the United States and the Kingdom of Great Britain."

calling all allies down: "1939 – World War II: France, the United Kingdom, New Zealand, and Australia declare war on Germany after the invasion of Poland, forming the Allies."

the summer ends: labor day weekend, 09.04.09 - 09.07.09

it's time to live today, incarnation: 33rd birthday, 09.05.09

scrapman: labor day, 09.07.09. time to get to work.

marinade

mingmedia's homegrown habeneros. i've called dibs on one for my marinade.

21 - 24 august 2009, taking the city

joshua 8:21: "And when Joshua and all Israel saw that the ambush had taken the city, and that the smoke of the city ascended, then they turned again, and slew the men of Ai."

1. hit reset.

2. new playlist, taking the city.

3. groom + clean routine.

3. homemade turkey burgers with hot cherry peppers, minced garlic, ground cumin, salt + pepper; topped with american cheese, bacon, tomato.

4. red sox game + movies.

5. up early, lazy morning breakfast and email.

6. leftover turkey burger lunch.

7. district 9.

8. long island family party:

9. home for top chef las vegas premier rerun and snacks.

10. asleep by 11.

11. up early, slow coffee.

12. all american burger.

13. jones beach to watch the remnants of hurricane bill:

14. freeport nautical mile for drinks:

tonight...

15. grilled london broil marinated in dijon mustard, olive oil, worcestershire sauce, ground cumin, chilli powder, hot sauce, salt + pepper.

16. red sox game.

tomorrow... taking the city.

one last wish, "my better half"

so sick.

reminds me why i have a tattoo of this band covering up a botched lifetime tattoo.

sojourn with the creative

"Each entrance of an entity into a material experience is that it may better fit itself, through the application of an ideal in its experience, for a sojourn with that which is Creative--that influence or force in which all move and have their consciousness, their being."

Edgar Cayce Reading 1759-1

nina simone

courtesy of the blue crane

leaving belfast

Leaving Belfast

for John Duncan

The planes fly so low over the houses in the east

their undercarriages seem like the stomachs of giant birds;

the skyline in town is the ragged, monitored heartbeat

of a difficult patient; the river holds its own,

and for every torn-up billboard and sick-eating pigeon

and execrable litter-blown street round Atlantic Avenue

there's some scrap of hope in the young, in the good looks of women,

in the leafiness of the smart zones, in the aerobatics of starlings.

There are good times and bad times, yes, but now you are

burning your bridges, and you are leaving Belfast

to its own devices: it will rise or fall,

it will bury its past, it will paper over the cracks

with car parks and luxury flats, it will make itself new—or perhaps

become the place it seemed before you lived here.

Leontia Flynn

Drives

Jonathan Cape

Copyright © 2008 by Leontia Flynn

All rights reserved.

a true irish catholic prayer

"...for in suffering strength is gained, even as the wind bloweth where it listeth--one heareth the sound thereof and knoweth not whither it cometh nor whence it goeth, yet that is as of the thought and intent in the individual characterization of self--that out of those forces comes that same in an individual or entity's being..."

- edgar cayce

bedford avenue crazy

i see this guy all the time. sometimes he pisses me off. this video sheds some new light. pretty amazing piece of video.

Study For "A Moral Society" from russel fong on Vimeo.

the spring campaigns

The Spring Campaigns

Other men remember the false gardens
of love, and the days they were in love
or thought they were in love, and others
the books they read as children, books that marked
their lives forever, though they couldn't know
in those days how the real world operates.
And all of them take comfort in this way
and even grow enthusiastic when
they realize that memory can shape
itself at will and provide the things
that love and books and gardens can't provide.
I remember what I didn't undertake:
more than anything, the spring campaigns.

Julio Martínez Mesanza
translated from the Spanish by Don Bogen

Boston Review
July / August 2009

thousandaires at charelston

actual new good bands. refreshing.

this is "every soldier"

Thousandaires - Every Soldier from If You Make It on Vimeo.

reaping what's sown, a follow up

timely chinese horoscope:

Your tendency to overeating will be increased by the current astral environment; try to control your appetite by different means; a reasonable diet program is likely to do you worlds of good. Also refrain from all kinds of excesses, especially sexual excesses. Careerwise, the situation may seem too quiet to you and you'll have the impression of making no progress; in fact, things are moving in the good direction and you'll soon reap all the fruits of your efforts.

rising above

"If it is held . . . as a cross, it will remain as one . . . with individuals where there is in their experience crosses to bear, hardships or surroundings that to them are overpowering, overwhelming, by slights, slurs, and fancies of the inactivity of a coordinating force. If these are held continually as crosses, or as things to be overcome, then they will remain as crosses. But if they are to be met with the spirit of truth and right in their own selves, they should create joy; for that is what will be built."

- edgar cayce

the misfits covering black flag:

a speeding train

the van pelt, "the speeding train"

dark tragedies of Woonsocket, Pawtucket, Providence
Empty warehouse shells by the tracks
Blurring by my window
while I slur a beer and scotch
150 miles an hour
away from my past

Circling the wagons
Around me and mine
Hunkering down,
waiting out the frost
Taking these lessons
to hibernate with me

- written on the amtrack to boston and sent to the blue crane 25 november 2008.

sent back to me last night.

reaping what's sown

"burned bridges," the get up kids (coalesce cover)

lughnasa approaching.



about to time to reap what's sown.

"i hope to define my life... by migrations"

I hope to define my life, whatever is left,

by migrations, south and north with the birds

and far from the metallic fever of clocks,

the self staring at the clock saying, "I must do this."

- jim harrison

i won't give in.

thanks vin. forgot about this.

reach the sky - "world stands still"

"best days ever"

la dispute, "the last lost continent"

I felt your sickness brush against my arm as I walked by you -
heard your voice but couldn't tell that it was you.
And, slowly, watched your sickness slip away into a place
that I'd once feared but I was not afraid this time
So I gave chase and found it, finally, slowly feeding from your head,
And from my friends, and from my family, so I grabbed it by the neck.
"For every lover you have ruined..." I dug my nails into its flesh.
"...and every life that you have taken..."
Slammed its head against the brick.
Its blood poured out onto the pavement,
I stirred it in with dirt and spit,
"I will take a part of you."
I made mortar from the mix.
Tore every organ from its body,
broke its bone and fashioned bricks,
I laid the mortar in between,
I made a throne for hope to sit.
"Too long you've torn us into pieces,
firmly held onto our wrists. Today I bury you in me."
I swallowed every inch of it.



I'll hold you, as you have held me -
you've held me in your heart, we'll be set free from fear.
We've felt our failures.
We've watched our passions leave, but we're still breathing on.
I'll hold you, as you have held me,
You've held me in your heart.
(And I will hold you in my heart)

But I still see him dead in the parking lot at the gas station just down the street.
And I still hear my friend say,
"You know, you wouldn't believe the things I saw when I was stationed overseas."
But he somehow keeps smiling in spite all of that,
while I keep finding ways to push the good out for the bad
Oh, how selfish of myself to always say that it was more than I could take,
like it was pain I could not shake,
like it could break me with its fingers, throw my body in the lake,
and I would slowly sink away
but the Truth is it was sorrow that I made and would not face.
See, I keep falling for the future after tripping on the past.
And I am always tearing sutures out to make the anguish last like it defines me.
Or reminds me I've found comfort in my suffering
and uncertainty in happiness and death,
because what's next is such a mystery to me.
I am terrified of all the things I feel but cannot see.
Friends and family, put your hand into my hand and lay your head into my chest.
You are all that I have left here
We are all that we have left.
We are the lovers, We are the last of our kind.
Link your arms and keep your chin up
and I swear that we'll be fine.
We are the lovers, We are the last of our kind.
Though we're not sure who we are, we keep our heads up
though we're not sure where we're from, we keep our hearts up
though we're not sure when we'll leave, we keep our heads up
though we're not sure where we'll go, we keep our hopes up

Keep your head up. we're fine. Just keep your head up. I swear we'll be alright.
Keep your head up. Oh, my friends, keep your head up. and I swear we'll never die.
I swear we'll get home safe and sound, we'll live on underground
I will give your heart a place to rest when everything you had has turned and left.
I'll weave your names into my ribcage; lock your hearts inside my chest.
Regain the passion I once carried; do away with all the rest.
I tore the sickness from your bodies; smashed its head against the bricks.
I made a castle from its bones that you may always dwell in it.
So sing for every buried moment that you'd thought would never end.
And sing your fears about the future; and a dirge for faded friends.
For all the love that you had held to, why it somehow failed to keep.
And sing each minute you've been frightened; every hour that you've lost sleep
And sing for all your friends and family; sing for those who didn't survive.
But sing not for their final outcome; sing a song of how they tried.
We live amidst a violent storm; leaves us unsatisfied at best,
So fill your heart with what's important, and be done with all the rest.
We are what's left of what we once were
We are falling far behind.
There's so much stacking up against us and we're running out of time.

We are but hopeful children, and we're the last of our kind.
But if we let our hearts move outward, I know we will never-
We are but friends and family, we are the last of our kind.
So hold my hand, I'll lift your head up, and I promise we'll be fine.
We are but hopeful lovers, and we are running out of time.
There's so much stacking up against us, and we're falling far behind.
We are but hopeful lovers, we are the last of our kind,
But if we let our hearts move outward, I know we will never-
We are but lovers, we are the last of our kind.
And if we let our hearts move outward, I know we will never-
We are but lovers, we are the last of our kind.
And if we let our hearts move outward, we will never die.

us vs. them suburban weekend

1. last light.
2. train rides to long island.
3. buy beer.
4. babylon sushi dinner.

5. robert moses beach day.


6. gemelli's grilling in the backyard.


7. red sox game.
8. drag me to hell.

9. bagel breakfast.
10. wimbeldon.
11. hockey break.


12. brick lane.
13. beach beers.

14. robert moses day 2.


15. gemelli's day 2.

16. early morning drive back to the city.

happy meal

best weekend.

1. happy hour at trailer park
2. dinner at spitzer's
3. drinks at motor city
4. crash at ace hotel

5. iced coffee and rockefeller center
6. nhl store
7. times square
8. bryant park
9. empire state building
10. lombardi's pizza
11. the dead end wiffle ball league inaugural games
12. hotel date
13. dinner in times square
14. drinks at ace hotel

15. brunch at park luncheonette
16. iced coffee at uro
17. mccarren park craft fair
18. shopping on n6th
19. drinks at iona
20. drinks at supyten duyvil
21. haircut
22. laundry
23. park beers
24. dinner at dumont burger
25. park beers

giving up the ghost

Ghost

Now your name's just a guest here, one that cancels
all hellos. Fleshless
you come & go through the mansion

of air. How
will I address you, small
weather? Sometimes your name's

a dress like an iron
bell the years
swing shadows from

longer that home. Can you hear
that word peal? I'm going
there now,

carrying the windows
from inside
all the vowels.

Mark Irwin

The Iowa Review
Spring 2009

night out with douglas

i love this and don't care who knows it

the new phoenix album is sick.

timely lost fotune's pulled from pocket

"before you see the light, you have to deal with the darkness."

"cookies go stale. fortunes are forever."

classic cave in

with travis on bass and the old singer. this is sick. have it on vhs...

converge?

east village jane doe riffing.

service inadequacies

every day...